When TV Meets Reality

Morning everyone 🌞☀⛅

Since my last post, I have been a busy bee 🐝 (compared to my past attempts.)

I haven’t been able to do much writing, due to work schedule, but that will all change these next few days. #hw7

DAYS OFF! *throws hands in the air and shouts* WOOT! WOOT! 🎆🎇🎊

(Addicted to Emojis 😊)

It’s a wonderful feeling when you worked for an off day. And I wanted to share.

Anywhoo…

A few days ago as I was working, my son, Bubba, asked me if he could go outside with his friend, “Mouse” 🐁. Mouse is a classmate around my son’s age. When he asked my permission, my initial response was, “Ya’ll can play outside, but don’t come in the house because I’m at work. I don’t want you guys running around screaming and what-not.”

He shook his head with a huge grin and scurried out of my office. I shouted just before  I heard the front door close, “Watch your sister and ya’ll stay safe.”

For the next hour, I worked with the understanding that my children were out in the front yard, playing. But when seven twenty-eight came around, I didn’t hear the kids frolicking. I was immediately concerned and sped walked to the front. My house isn’t big, in fact it’s the opposite. It can get pretty rowdy with Leah and Bubba alone and the dog.  So, it worried me very much when I didn’t hear them.

And to my horror, my children or anyone else’s was nowhere in sight.

For a mother who spends her free time engrossed in investigation discovery (#ID), my heart plunged in my stomach with fear. For those who haven’t watched any shows from the channel, it primarily airs real stories of people of all ages who have come to an unfortunate demise due to some horrific circumstance. They have witness testimony from detectives who investigate the case and the people involved. Our world is not kind. There are people, whether we want to acknowledge their existence or not, who WILL harm children out of some sick, disturbing sport or some other psychological reason.

Because I do work from home, I normally stay in my pjs, depending on how I’m feeling and that day, I wore the minimum.

It took me five minutes to dress and get Pana 🐼🐶 in the room and another two minutes panicking on where should I even look. I power walked up and down my street, around the corner, asking anyone if they saw my children. I even showed them pictures of what they look like. A lot of people didn’t see anyone fitting their description, but one woman did see some children crossing the main road to other side of the street, which is several blocks from where we stay. The information triggered a nerve and unpleasant thoughts emerged. I calmed myself down, telling myself I was overthinking. To prove myself wrong, I gave her a description of what they were wearing and she apologized, saying the children she saw were Mexican.

Although I was a little relieved that they my babies didn’t cross the busy lanes, where their father was almost hit by a car more than once, I was still nowhere in locating them. At this point, I called my mother and father and they were as frantic as I. As I got off the phone with them, my best friend called and we started brainstorming where they may have gone– we came up with nothing, since my son’s best friend stays across from us. At the same time, I’m still huffing up and down the street, searching.

I want to say another twenty minutes went by, but I’m not sure. I was so hysterical in finding them, each second felt like an hour. I was retracing were I had walked earlier when a car pulled up beside me. It was the woman from earlier and she said she found my children. My heart fluttered and I was about three seconds away from dashing down the street, breathless to get to them. She was kind and offered me a ride back to my house, where my children awaited peering in the windows.

I thanked the woman, checked my children to make sure they were okay and then we all went into the house where I unleashed hell’s fury. All the mixed feelings of worrying and frustrated and upset that my son disobeyed me exploded in a loud-talking lecture.  But, after a few minutes I calmed down and went back to my son and apologized if my behavior scared him. I sat down next to him on the couch and we talked:

“What you did wasn’t right. I was worried. My heart hurt because I didn’t know where you guys were.”

He averted his eyes. “I’m sorry, mom. But I kept Leah safe.”

“Yes, you did and thank you. But you have to understand. Shawne, you have trouble keeping track on the important things in life that you need. Like your inhaler and reading glasses. Remember, what I told you?”

He nodded.

“What did I tell you?”

“To be responsible and keep up with my medicine.”

“And did you do that?”

He eyes started to water. “No. I lost them.”

“Right. And what did I tell you about leaving the yard?”

“To ask you and have a grown-up.” By this point he was crying so hard his eyes were red.

“Which you didn’t do that either. You’re a big boy now. And big boys have to be a little more careful. You and Lean could have gotten hurt.” I reached over and hugged him. “Part of your responsibilities is to do what you are told. Mama doesn’t even like it when you cross the street careless to go to the neighbor’s house. Of course, I would be worried if you cross the road where there are a lot of cars…”

Our conversation went on for at least half an hour after and I repeated why what he did was wrong. I told him it was okay that he wanted to be with his friend, but not okay that he disobeyed me. A big boy listens to his parents even when he wants to do something else.  He cried more after our talk then he had my first approach when I initially found him. He kept apologizing and I reassured him it was fine because he was safe, but he was grounded from his gaming systems for a month, which included Youtube.

Having his toys taken away really broke him down, and since then he’s been on a good terms at home and school.

( He’s trying to sugar me up with his sweet talk 🍬🍭🍥)

We’ve gotten close and he opens up to me more, which I’m blessed. But, I have never experienced anything as freighting or stomach churning as that day. Now, my fears are heightened. When the day comes for them to leave the nest, not sure how I’m going to take it. I know there might be a few times where he’s going to test me, especially in his teens.

That is life for ya… 🌿🍃

Good-parenting-quotes

Taken with Lumia Selfie

Taken with Lumia Selfie // Leah and Bubba 

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