When My Son Misbehaves

As a parent, it’s extremely frustrating when I cannot help my children, especially in school. School is difficult for anybody, but I think it’s a lot harder on children. Since the first day my eight-year-old son started school,  and I’m talking about kindergarten days, he struggled with communicating and keeping friends. Those days his behavior was minor, I rarely got a call and had to come up to school, especially after I signed him up to see the school’s counselor regularly.  Now as a second grader, his behavior is effecting his academics. It’s frustrating because I’m a concern parent and everything that I have tried up to this point is failing.

Far as a I can remember, the male in my family suffered from some sort of mental illness. My brother was diagnosed with ADHD (Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder), so was my cousin. My older cousins; I can’t give a definite yes, but from what I was told and experienced, some of them also suffered from something similar. I grew up aware and observed. I didn’t know how to help them, I always suggested they seek professional services.

So, when my son started showing signs at the age of three, I took my own advice and did just that. I was told by several counselors, psychiatrists, and physicians, my son’s intelligence wasn’t the issue, but the way he processed being in a social environment. In terms that I can relate, he’s socially awkward. He behaves inappropriately and almost toddler-like for his age. Lately, it’s progress where I had to take off work to go up to his school. His teacher and I exchanged numbers in hopes that are constant communication will help. Well, this is what she sent me today:

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Not only is he “relaxing,”  he’s eating on his shirt… again.

NOW, I understand those parents who were called and actually came up to the school for their child. They wanted to make their presence known that they cared about their child and their education.

Side note* Education is very important to me. I don’t care how my child succeeds, as long as they are doing something they love and is continuously growing from their experience.

But the problem is that MY son’s behavior is not healthy for him or the family. I’m not sure where my next step is, but I do know, I’m walking on thin ice. What do you do in situations like these? We tried everything from sitting down and talking with him, to grounding him from his game systems, to giving him tough love. They all have one common factor— they work temporarily.

If anything, I’m a pushover with my babies until I find out the truth. I love playing detective and my son knows that, so lying is futile.

So, you can kind of understand where I’m heading. I’m not an expert. I’m a regular Jane, who’s experiencing life through trial and error. I’m stern when I have to be, and lax when I should be. But this is the first time, where I’m lost. Jackson and I have been talking about taking him out of school and for me to homeschool him. But, I’m sort of against it. I think it’s best to learn in an environment where there are others learning too. It’s good to be social and outgoing, even if it’s only with one other person. I want my children to discover their likes and dislikes and the only way to do so is by experiencing life.

Right?

GAWH!

A lot to think over. I know that children will be children and this could be a phase. But the way our world works nowadays, even children can mess up their whole life. When he comes home, he’s going to get a huge surprise. Not sure what type of discipline would work, even if only temporarily. If you have any ideas, I’m looking for something on the lines of humiliation. Like printing a sign that says, “Hi, my name is Shawne and I have to wear this because I am in trouble” and then make him wear it all day. Sort of like that.  Will do research, here in a bit…

You wouldn’t believe it, but as I’m typing this post, I received a call from his school… So, there’s no surprise. He’s grounded all day in his room. No video games for him. It’s more maddening when he gives me a snooty attitude over the phone. The nerve of my son!

*takes deep breath*

That’s it for now on my life update. I’m going to test the whole grounded thing over the next week and add a few extras like the sign example for when he is in school.  Looks like I’ll be paying  his teacher and counselor another visit tomorrow.

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5 Comments on “When My Son Misbehaves

  1. Great post, I can relate as I’ve had issues with my son. He’s very smart but always been socially awkward, anxious around others and temperamental as a child. I try and be a good role model and use positive words but it can be very hard as a parent. An ongoing labor of love and hard work.

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